My weak symbol of hope – Living with anxiety

When something goes wrong, it stays with me for an awfully long time.

It is extremely difficult to get over something which has triggered me.

Mr Anxiety wedges himself from firmly within my brain, and remains there.

When I am triggered, he will make sure I feel the physical symptoms. All of a sudden I’m just far too tired to do anything. And I’m overwhelmed by the White Cloud of Worthlessness today. I’ve been working, but I procrastinate… a hell of a lot. And I’m always saying ‘it’ll do’. Minimal effort, because the effort it takes to present as ‘normal’, whatever normal is, is overpowering.

My tiny ray of light is persistent. She tries, casting a weak symbol of hope in an otherwise darkened room.

The sun was shining today, followed by a spell of furious rain. But it always stops, and sometimes the sun will come out again, as if to say, ‘it’s okay, things are as they should be’.

And maybe, with all of the downpours to follow, some sun might just make it all better again.

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